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How to discuss getting a postnup in a same-sex marriage

Most married individuals would see the suggestion of getting a postnuptial agreement as a red flag. While a prenup can give your partner the idea that you are unsure about marriage, a postnup can scare your spouse into thinking that you have your sights set on divorce.

When framed the right way, prenuptial and postnuptial agreements can actually be tools to help both individuals feel more secure in their marriage. Same-sex marriages exhibit different trends than heterosexual marriages, and understanding these patterns can help you and your spouse get on the same page in regards to getting a postnup.

How a postnuptial agreement can strengthen a marriage

Statistics from the United States Census Bureau show same-sex couples are likelier to have both members working. While marriage your marriage may be a commitment to share your life and wealth, it is likely that you and your partner each value your individual careers and achievements if you are both working. A postnuptial agreement can solidify the idea that you are both independent people, and it does not have to undermine the desire to love and support one another.

How to bring up the topic of a postnuptial agreement

While the use of statistics and trends might lend logic to your point that getting a postnup can help your marriage, not everyone responds well to such a method. Consider emphasizing that you care about your partner’s ability to maintain their livelihood and independence even if the worst should happen.

When discussing the idea of getting a postnuptial agreement, it is important to remember that the document should serve to protect both members of a marriage. If a postnup benefits one individual over the other, then you should balance it to become a better addition to your partnership.

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